No Time to Say Goodbye by Kate Hewitt

Author:Kate Hewitt [Hewitt, Kate]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Family Life, General, Literary, Fiction, Women, Coming of age
Goodreads: 46744464
Publisher: Bookouture
Published: 2019-09-27T00:00:00+00:00

* * *

That afternoon, I gave Neriha my notice. She stared at me in disbelief.

“You are going to work as a nanny? For that family?”

“It’s a good opportunity, with good benefits. Health insurance…”

“Maria, in all the time I’ve known you…” Neriha shook her head slowly. “You’ve never done something like this.”

“There was never the opportunity.”

“But do you even know these people? Do you even know how to take care of children?”

“I know them a bit,” I said defensively. “And I know enough about children. Besides, does any nanny know the family before she works with them?” I shrugged. “This is normal.” Even if it felt like jumping off a cliff, letting myself fall and fall.

“What about your friends? Your community? You’ve been in Astoria for almost twenty years…”

“I’ll still be in Astoria. I’m not moving, Neriha.” And surely she knew I had no real friends. No real community. Yes, there were people in my life, like her and Selma, a few others, but they remained forever on the fringes. Perhaps they all assumed there were other people closer in, when there never had been.

“Won’t you feel lonely?” Neriha pressed, and I almost laughed at the ludicrousness of such a question.

Lonely? I’d been lonely for twenty-six years. For the first time since the war, since everything, I had the chance not to be lonely. And, for the first time, I was willing to take it.

“I’ll manage, Neriha. But I’m sorry to be leaving here so soon. The Wests need me next week.”

Neriha shrugged, as if to say “it’s your life”. And finally it felt like it was. My life, rather than just drifting as a ghost.

That night, I texted Nathan, not brave enough to call and speak in person, telling him I would accept the position. He texted back immediately, saying I could start on Monday, the day after the girls got back. If I wanted, if it was okay, I could come over on Sunday afternoon to see them when they got back from Boston. I said I would.

I could hardly believe the steps I’d taken, the possibilities unfolding in front of me, and so fast. This was really happening. My new life was beginning. After all this time, I was finally coming alive, and it brought me both joy and terror.

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